Mother’sDay on the Way

Tomorrow in Australia it will be Mother’s day. It always been a bitter sweet day for me having lost my mother as baby, a son in my early 20s and raising two beautiful children who are the oxygen in my cells.

It’s really just another day for me - I find it difficult to receive the love and care my kids give me on Mother’s day and also am not really into days of celebration of being parent for me that is each day.

This year I find myself reflecting on the importance of receiving love , compliments and care with grace and not rebuttle or deflection. It’s been something I have had to learn and am still learning.

This year I am also brave enough to mourn, let myself feel sorrow for the lost of my mum who I never knew except through the eyes and experiences of others. To be sad and know that its ok. To explore what she would have thought of me and more importantly would she be proud of me. Can you love someone you never knew? I feel like I can and do.

To also take the time to think about both of my Aunts who continue to fill the roles in my life that my mum would have had. I think of them as my mums, my aunts and my sisters all in one and enjoy the relationships I have with them and reflect how much of their own lives they have given up to care and love for me over the years and my kids.

I am also truely thankful for my mum in Mexico who took me in to her home,heart and family and loves me for me. Who I miss every day, who stands beside me as I walk (as do my aunts, and who demonstrates the grace in unconditional love. Thank you to all these great women who have been parents to me. I feel super privileged and am better for having you all in my life.

Being a parent is hard, fun, inspiring, draining, terrifying, deeply moving and wounding. You don’t always get it right, but what people dont tell you is how much you learn about yourself from your kids - well at least for me that has been the case. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without their patience, kindness, laughter, sense of adventure, bossyiness, care and challenging my leadership of the family. This has been the most important. That they could challenge me and we all still cared for one another. I wasn’t always right. I learnt from them.

A group of other mothers on the Camino are treating themselves to taking a taxi to the next town tomorrow - each celebrating Mother’s day in their own way and doing the Camino their way.

I splurged on a really nice dinner tonight at the Hotel Monestarerio San Zoila, in Carrión de los Condes which I shared with my kids in my head, reflected on their lives and achievements knowing there is many more to come. On Mother’s day I find I am just thankful for them, that they can be themselves with me and that I was lucky enough to be their mum. Crystal and Ned - thank you for being you. I love you both deeply.

Today was a light walking day but a heavy thinking day…there are no small days on the Camino. Here are some pics from today